April 5, 2012
Day 26 by BC

Thank you for visiting the office of Ms. Bettina Chang, the Editor Extraordinaire. What type of edit would you like today? Here are your options:

Level 1: Copy edit. I’ll make sure you don’t look like a douche because of stupid typos/misspellings, subject-verb agreement and blatant misuse of commas and other punctuation marks.

Level 2: Line edit. I’ll go through line by line and make sure your ideas make sense in the order that you put them down, which they probably don’t. Just sayin’.

Level 3: Structural edit. Utter and complete destruction of your carefully constructed piece. Think of it as prose Armageddon or the molecular gastronomy of the written word. I will deconstruct that sucker to its barest ingredients and rebuild it into something that looks completely foreign to you, but is nonetheless delicious. And then I’ll charge you up the wazoo for it.

Just kidding. Everyone knows that editors don’t get to charge up the wazoo for anything.

 
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